How Motherhood Transforms Friendships: Navigating the Changes

Becoming a mom changes everything, including your friendships. It’s a complete rework of existing relationships and future connections. As your priorities shift to diapers, strollers, and the tiny human you’re trying to keep alive, friendships can take a major turn.

• Changing Priorities: You might find yourself saying “no” to things you once enjoyed, like endless conversations, nights out, or weekend trips.

• Loneliness and Misunderstanding: Being the first in your friend group to have a baby can lead to feelings of loneliness and being misunderstood. It’s hard for others to truly “get it” until they’re in it.

• Inconvenience: Some friends may disappear once it becomes slightly inconvenient to maintain the friendship.

• Different Life Stages: Your mind is focused on baby-related things, while your friends might still be in a different life stage.

Why It Happens: 

• Brain Changes: A woman’s physical makeup changes when she has a baby, even her brain. This affects how you interact with people, the time you have available, and your priorities.

• Feeling Cut Off: A survey showed that 68% of new parents felt “cut off” from close friends after their baby arrived.

• Loneliness: A study found that 82% of moms under 30 experienced loneliness after childbirth.

• Acceptance: Recognize that change is normal and doesn’t diminish the value of past friendships.

• Seek Deeper Connections: Form friendships based on more than just shared vicinity or activities.

• Be Open and Understanding: Find new friends who are open, understanding, and accommodating.

• Adjust Expectations: It’s crucial to accept and adapt to a shifting social life. Maintaining Community

• Stay in Touch: Being a parent doesn’t mean your social life is over.

• Curate Your Circle: As you become more comfortable in your parenting, your circle becomes more purposeful.

• Remember: Some friendships may drift back when your friends start having kids too.

Motherhood reworks friendships, but maintaining community is important.